6 strategies to improve self-esteem in adolescence
Tips to help adolescents learn to accept and value themselves.
For many young people, adolescence is a complicated stage of life that goes hand in hand with an identity crisis. This type of crisis does not only occur at an intellectual level; it also has clear emotional implications, which is why there are many who, once they have crossed the threshold of puberty, feel dizzy when faced with the task of discovering who they really are, accepting and loving themselves.
In this article we will review the most useful self-esteem-enhancing strategies to help adolescents, based on key ideas used in psychotherapy.based on key ideas used in psychotherapy.
Why is it important to help adolescents have good self-esteem?
Adolescence is a key developmental stage of life when the transition between childhood and adulthood occurs.. Therefore, the experiences lived during these years have important implications in shaping the way in which young people learn to see themselves and manage the emotions linked to their identity.
Thus, the development of self-esteem during adolescence is a complex process, full of challenges in which children must learn on the fly to value themselves, to focus on one or another referent and to use concepts through which to explore themselves and put into words what they are and how they feel. It is not easy, because from the onset of puberty, their referents are no longer their parents, but the rest of their peers. (and above all, those who are a little older than them), who are also often quite disoriented in this mission of self-discovery.
As a result, the way in which adolescents value themselves is often very polarizing: sometimes they feel on top of the world, and on many other occasions, they feel vulnerable and focus their attention on what they believe to be their biggest flaws, which they try to hide. With that in mind, it is not surprising that this stage of life is when many of the most common psychological disorders, such as depression or EDs, skyrocket in frequency.
It is common for adolescence to be emotionally convulsive.In the most severe cases, young people adopt the belief that they are "good for nothing". In fact, it has been seen that in the age range between 12 and 18 years, cases of suicidal ideation shoot up rapidly in relation to children under 12 years of age.
The good news is that, on the one hand, the fact of being an adolescent does not necessarily imply having emotional and self-esteem problems, and on the other hand, even in minors who suffer from these psychological alterations it is possible to offer effective help both from psychotherapy and from the family.
Useful strategies to boost an adolescent's self-esteem.
Faced with self-esteem problems, the best option is always to go to psychotherapy to explore the specific case and to have a tailor-made psychological intervention program, regardless of the person's age. However, in mild cases, another option is to apply some guidelines and strategies that are often useful to promote habits from which it is easier to raise self-esteem. Here you will find a summary of the most effective in the case of adolescents.
1. Don't compare him with other young people his age
If you have noticed that they have self-esteem problems, it is most likely that they are already comparing themselves with them constantly, and moreover, that they do it through very rigid criteria about what they think they are good at. rigid criteria about what "success" and "failure" are.". The point is precisely to broaden his palette of values and concepts of what is valuable and speaks well of oneself, and he will probably not find this in his group of friends or classmates, a relatively small social context in which there will probably not be a great variety of activities or opinions, tastes and points of view.
The ideal is not to encourage them to compare themselves with others, but rather to in any case have sources of inspiration in relevant figures in which there is a part of their interests.. For example, if you have a teenage daughter who feels bad because she thinks she is "weird" because she likes sports, show her the example of other great athletes, even if they are not her age.
2. Help him find his hobbies
As an adult, you are much more likely to have access to information or references that are far from your teenager's life. Find out what activities they might enjoy, offer to teach them a hobby..
Don't encourage him to look down on activities that are "weird".
If you teach him to laugh at the different, it will also turn against him.He will become obsessed with the idea of fitting into the groups to which he wants to belong and will repress any aspects of himself that may be discordant.
4. Help him to make new friends
Put him in contact with neighbors' children, distant cousins, young people attending an after-school activity he might like, etc. The more likely he is to make friends, The more likely he will be able to let go of toxic relationships that make him feel bad about his that make him feel bad about the way he is; it will be easier for him to feel appreciated and accepted by a group of young people his age, which is very important in adolescence.
5. Offer your help, but without interrogation.
If your way of reacting to suspicions that he or she has self-esteem problems is to fire off a flurry of questions about what he or she has done during the day and how he or she is feeling, he or she is likely to become defensive. It is better to express honestly that we are concerned about him or her, and tell him or her that we would like to be able to help..
6. Put in value his or her achievements
If you put as much or more emphasis on what he or she does wrong than on what he or she does right, you will be making it difficult for him or her to develop good self-esteem. Let him know that you recognize his accomplishments as such and appreciate their value, and tell others about them.and tell others about them. In that way, his social environment will give him reasons to value himself and incentives to keep progressing in what he is good at and what motivates him.
Looking for psychotherapy services for children and adolescents?
If you are interested in professional psychological support for your son or daughter through child and adolescent psychotherapy, please contact us.
At Avance Psychologists we have been treating patients for more than 20 years, and we work helping people of all ages, both intervening in cases of psychopathologies and problems such as poor management of relationships, learning problems and / or time management, or inadequate modulation of emotions. We also offer services in speech therapy, coaching, neuropsychology and psychiatry.
You can find us in our psychology office located in the Goya neighborhood of Madrid, and we also offer online services via video call.
(Updated at Apr 12 / 2024)