What to do when your boyfriend or girlfriend ignores you (in 7 steps).

One of those situations in which a couple conflict can occur.

Finding that person who makes us happy as a couple can be an experience that allows us to have a fulfilling life.. In fact, looking for and finding a partner is one of the goals that many of us have, because having a romantic life with someone we consider amazing, changes our life.

The world of interpersonal relationships, and especially that of the couple, is especially complex since it is not easy that, in addition to attraction, we find in that person the variables that allow the relationship to be maintained over time: capacity for dialogue, respect, tolerance, etc. Sometimes being in love is not enough to have a successful life as a couple, and conflicts can appear to the point of deteriorating that beautiful initial feeling.

When our partner ignores us

And it is that, sometimes, the partner can get to change its initial behavior. If at the beginning he/she gave everything for us, he/she may ignore us. Have you ever had that feeling?

This unpleasant feeling can cause many problems for the person who feels rejected because he or she may come to believe that it is his or her fault or that the partner no longer loves him or her. Sometimes, it can be a communication problem that needs to be solved, so it is always good to talk things over.

To prevent things from escalating, you can carry out a series of actions that will allow you to know why your boyfriend ignores you and what you should do to solve it.. In the following lines we present some tips that you should use when your partner ignores you.

1. Analyze your behavior

Relationships are complex, and it may happen that, at some point in the relationship, your boyfriend/girlfriend feels hurt by some of your behavior. This does not have to be the reason, but it may be the case that it is. While it's good to talk things out, sometimes we can get to the point where we get fed up with someone's behavior after several warnings. Be realistic, and if you really had something to do with it, you'd better be self-critical and acknowledge your mistakes..

2. Put yourself in their shoes

Following on from the previous point, it is good to try to understand your partner's behavior. Maybe the reason for his distancing is your behavior, or maybe things are not going well at work and he is not going through the best time. While he should be counting on you for these things, he may not be having a good time. Try to see it from his perspective. But don't get obsessed..

3. Communicate

The above two points can help you understand the context and find a way to talk to your partner. However, when you think that what is happening does not make sense or that what is happening is affecting you, it's best to be clear and talk things out in the open.. If the person you are with loves you, they will eventually tell you what is going on. Communication is the best way to avoid unnecessary conflicts, because when each one pulls for his side, the relationship can deteriorate and the dating relationship can worsen.

4. Avoid mind games

When we opt for an option that is not communication, we can try to play mind games with the other person or adapt our behavior to attract their attention.. For example, wanting to make our partner jealous. Although this may seem like a good alternative. can ultimately damage the trust and the smooth running of the relationship. Undoubtedly, it is not the best option to bring positions closer together and regain mutual trust.

5. Focus on yourself and leave the obsession aside.

It can also happen that, when trying to find out what is going on in a person's mind, we become obsessed and stop being ourselves. This can make us sad, something that can hijack our attention and negatively change our behavior. That's why it's important to focus on yourself, because when you are ignored, your self-esteem can suffer.. If we fight for our own personal development and find inner peace, it is easier to be less affected by how we are treated and what others say about us.

6. Ask for respect

If you have done your part to make things change but the other person continues to ignore you, you should not let him or her disrespect you or get away with it.. By demanding respect, the other person knows where the line is drawn and what you will tolerate. Undoubtedly, communication is key in this regard. But if after talking to that person and seeing no results, perhaps you should start to seriously consider the path the relationship is taking.

7. Make a decision

If at this point the person continues to act in this way, maybe there really is something going on or there is a serious reason that motivates him or her to act this way. If you talk to him or her and he or she is defensive or tells you that he or she will change but does not, he or she may be playing games with you or, in the worst case scenario, has become disillusioned with the relationship. It could also be that there is actually a third person. If you suspect this, maybe you should take a look at our article "8 keys to know if your partner is unfaithful and cheating on you". If this situation persists over time, you must make a decision. Maybe leaving him/her is the right option.