Does pornography decrease the desire for our partner?
It is said that the consumption of pornographic material reduces the desire to have real sex. Is it true?
The world of pornography moves millionsIt is one of the most profitable industries globally. Although in the past it was considered something shameful, today there are few people who have never seen any type of pornographic material. But since its inception, it has generated controversy and debate regarding the effects that its consumption can have, especially in the area of the couple.
Some people consider it a betrayal akin to infidelity for their partner to watch pornographic videos or believe that they do it because they are already loved for it. Is this true? Does pornography destroy the quality of relationships? Let's start by defining what we are talking about, which is often confused.
- Related article, "How can we improve our sexual desire?"
What do we mean by pornography?
As most people already know, pornography or ponography is that set of works or representations of explicit sexual content that are generated with the purpose of exciting or satisfying their viewers or viewers.
Although nowadays the consumption of pornography is mostly through the network and is based on audiovisual content in the form of based on audiovisual content in the form of videos. It is also considered as such any type of stimuli that meet the characteristics described above. Thus, we can find pornographic photographs or magazines or even written stories.
But pornography must be distinguished from eroticism. While eroticism also tries in part to provoke the user's attraction to pornography. through insinuation (which may or may not include full nudity and sexual attitudes) and may be linked to the artistic, in the case of pornography it is shown in its entirety for the basic purpose of sexual gratification. It is also important to keep in mind that what is considered pornographic can vary greatly between cultures, between subjects of the same culture or even at different times for the same subject.
Once we have visualized the concept of pornography, we can observe what effects porn has on the world of the couple.
Effects of porn on couple relationships
Since the emergence of pornography and the study of its effects on the population that consumes it, controversy has arisen as to how it can affect the functioning of a couple..
The answer to how pornography consumption can affect a couple's relationship depends largely on the characteristics and considerations of each of its components. There are people who still see the consumption of pornography as a betrayal or as something or something worrying that translates into a lack of desire for one's partner. The reason for this conflict is usually insecurity, fear of losing one's partner or of not being desired.
In this sense, a study carried out in 1989 affirmed that male consumers of these products ended up feeling less sexual and affective interest in their partners, as they considered them less desirable. by their partners, considering them to be less attractive in comparison. However, although this study had wide repercussions, it was carried out with a very small sample that did not really allow the results to be generalized.
A more recent conclusion
More recently, this study has been replicated with a much larger sample. Through several trials, we have tried to evaluate the impact of pornography viewing and its effect on the attraction and feelings of those analyzed with respect to their partners.
The results have shown that there is no relationship between the two factors. Thus, it can be considered that no, the consumption of pornography (as long as there are no factors such as addiction or it is used as a way of avoidance and escape from reality on a frequent basis) does not generate a decrease in desire or esteem for the partner..
It should also be taken into account that the consideration given to sex and sexuality in general has evolved throughout history, with more and more information and the presence of sexual elements in our daily lives. This means that over time things like the consumption of pornography has become much more widespread and normalized, so the idea of one partner watching porn is not so strange and is less likely to be experienced in a negative way.
Beneficial effects of its consumption
In fact, nowadays the consumption of pornography can even be beneficial for many couples.
And is that unless it is used as the only means of sexual learning, porn can provide numerous ideas regarding ways to enjoy sexuality in ways other than the usual. There are couples who view this type of material together, using it as a way to stimulate each other and increase sexual stimulation. as a way to stimulate each other and increase libido, while providing as well as providing them with ideas regarding different games and ways to enjoy their sexuality together. On an individual level it can stimulate imagination and desire.
Also, pornography generally integrates aspects and people of different backgrounds and orientations. It can help to break certain taboos, as well as in some cases it can help can help some people to get to know their own body (e.g. in aspects such as the (for example in aspects such as female masturbation, which even today is still a taboo for some people) and ways to stimulate it.
It can also be used as a tool to make explicit and communicate desires and fantasies that would not normally be expressed. In fact, it is sometimes recommended in some marital therapies, since it helps to learn and share moments of physical and mental stimulation together.
Situations in which it can be harmful
Although the consumption of pornography is not negative and does not have to cause damage to the relationship, as is the case with most things can be negative if it is used in a dysfunctional or excessive way..
This is what happens in those people who turn to porn as an escape route from problems with their partner, using it to distance themselves and not to face conflicts. The same happens with very withdrawn people with poor social skills who may resort to these materials as a compensation mechanism, limiting their interaction. In these cases, the existence of low mood and self-esteem may be registered and the use of pornography may only temporary relief, and then later on the mood may be reduced..
Also, in some people pornography can generate addiction. And as with any addiction, we find ourselves with a frequent and prolonged consumption of a stimulus which over time will require more and more quantity to obtain the same effects. The subject may spend excessive time and limit his or her interactions with the environment (including partners) and neglect other responsibilities and activities. Also, the withdrawal or absence of the latter may cause high anxiety, irritability and hostility and hostility that can end up causing serious damage to the relationship.
Other adverse effects
Another case in which it can be harmful is when porn is used as the only means of sexual learning. It must be taken into account that the world of pornography reflects sexual relationships between actors and actresses who usually stand out for their physique and sexual attributes, relationships that also have specific characteristics (high duration and intensity, specific roles and attitudes during relations...) and that focus on genitality.
In this way, certain stimuli and ways of proceeding are normalized, which can lead to expectations of what a satisfactory sexual relationship entails that may later prove difficult to fulfill in reality. There is also the risk of and trivializing the affective aspects, and may only identify and may identify only penetration with obtaining satisfaction, without taking into account other activities that may be erotic and pleasurable, such as massages, kisses, games or caresses.
(Updated at Apr 12 / 2024)